UPDATE!
Today, the California Supreme Court overturned the gay marriage ban sighting that the ban against gay marriage is unconstitutional. Read about in the Los Angeles Times.

This is HUGE news and HUGE progress. I was so excited to hear the news, I began to cry. This kind of thing is exactly what Joanne and I are hoping for. Barring any unforeseen disputes of this judgment, you can bet that Joanne and I will begin to plan a wedding to take place in our home state of California.

Today, Blog Catalog is hosting Bloggers Unite for Human Rights. While I have not participated in previous Bloggers Unite posts, this topic was one that appealed to me on a very personal level. So, I take a break from my normally scheduled how to for bloggers posts to share with you my very personal human rights fight.

As most of my readers know, I’m a very happy open lesbian. For the last 6 ½ years I have shared my life with my very wonderful partner, Joanne. Just 2 ½ years ago, we became a family by adopting our daughter, Zadey Jade.

And as smooth as Zadey’s adoption was, including being allowed to adopt her as a couple, as a lesbian, lesbian couple, and lesbian family, we’re fighting for some basic rights that heterosexual couples do not even have to think about.

With this post, I want to tell you what those rights are and how you can join the movement to give LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender) couples the very basic human rights that you’re used to.

Marriage

Still governed by religious beliefs, LGBT couples are not permitted to marry each other in the United States. This very thing is the number one reason why the following rights are not available to us.

Joint Taxes

While this month many taxpayers are receiving a tax rebate check, Joanne and I are receiving a lesser amount because we are not a legally married couple without the ability to file taxes as a joint couple. If we were a straight couple, our domestic partnership status would enable us to file state taxes together, however not federal. (Even though we live in Las Vegas, NV where there are no state taxes.)

Health Care

Unless a company chooses to recognize our individual domestic partnership status, many LGBT couples do not have access to adequate health care.

Fortunately, this is one case where Joanne and I are covered. Joanne has worked for Target for the last 13 years. Target is dedicated to human rights, equal rights for same-sex couples, and our families. Not only covering my health care as Joanne’s domestic partner but Zadey’s health and well being as well. This is just one of the many reasons why I am very pro-Target and anti-Wal-Mart. [ Target Community ]

Illness

Should either Joanne or I fall ill tomorrow and be admitted to the hospital, there are no laws in place to force the hospital to allow us to state each other’s rights, allow us visits, or give us any respect or consideration. We’re treated as single, un-married people and by that nature; our next of kin is our respective parents.

For me, this means that if something happens to Joanne, I must rely on her Mother to listen to me regarding Joanne’s wishes for her health care. And while I’m close with her Mom, I believe that given bad circumstances she’d be unwilling to listen to me state my case. And regardless, the presence of Joanne’s Mother would still not permit me to visit Joanne if she were ill.

Could you image what it would be like to not visit your husband or wife if they were ill, sick, or even worse, dying? What if you never had your moment and it was taken from you?

Social Security

As someone who will probably spend the rest of her life as an entrepreneur, I will have little social security benefits available to me when I retire. What I do have will come from jobs I held between 16 and 23 – not enough to sustain me. Should I lose Joanne in our old age, her social security will not be available to me because I am not married to her. After Zadey turns 18 years of age, it’ll be Zadey who will become Joanne’s next of kin and by then, she still won’t have rights to Joanne’s social security because she will be “of age.”

Adoption

While Joanne and I had a smooth process, there are more states than not that do not allow same sex couples to adopt. Many of the most headline making attempts to adopt by same sex couples coming from Florida however, they’re not the only state that does not permit same sex adoptions.

In fact, only 19 of our 51 states allow same sex adoptions. Many of these adoptions are taking place in a two step process. One person from the couple adopts a child and the second partner comes in to do a second-parent adoption after the child has been taken out of the state’s custody.

Our Options

Many of the fundamental rights that heterosexual couples have, homosexual couples can obtain by hiring a lawyer and having documents drawn to state our wills and wishes. It’s not bullet proof, it still doesn’t mean our rights won’t be questioned and it still doesn’t mean that the law that is in favor of heterosexual couples won’t harm the financial expense we bare in an attempt to safe guard our non-existent rights.

The truth of the matter is that LBGT couples often times foot the expense of having legal papers drawn to give our partners the same rights that straight couples get just by taking vows.

Civil Unions

Happening all over our country, and world, a civil union can be performed by anyone. But this very thing does not give us any legal rights.

Religion

Let’s be frank, your religious belief and God has no place in my home or my bedroom. You wouldn’t push your religious beliefs on me if you came to my door to preach and I declined. Why should I be forced to live with your religious beliefs within my home and to fight for my human rights?

Small Progress Harmed

In February 2004, Mayor Gavin Newsom opened San Francisco, California up to gay marriages stating that the law prohibiting gay marriage in the United States was unconstitutional.

Joanne and I became witnesses to a gay marriage held in San Francisco during this time. We spent days on the court steps with our friends, waiting for their turn for a go at the very right to get married and have their love recognized by the country.

At this moment, I’d like you to note that Joanne and I did not get married and chose not to. Instead, we decided that we hadn’t been together long enough and that by taking vows ourselves we’d be disrespectful of the couple we were there to witness; a couple that had been together for 15 years at the time. Our friends from church who also got married had been together for 25 years when they were married in San Francisco.

By May of 2004, all of the gay marriages that took place in San Francisco were annulled sighting the marriages as unconstitutional. Today, those marriage licenses issued to the thousands of lucky couples are nothing more than symbols of the loss of hope and progress our country made, for only a second.

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell

A policy implement by the Clinton administration in 1993, the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy indicates that you should not ask the sexuality of anyone serving in the US military. Those who come out while serving for our military are subject to being discharged. [ More Information ]

Get Involved

Consider this and allow me to appeal to your humanity to take action.

If your God believes that all people are created equally, shouldn’t we be treated as such? If you teach your children that we should love our neighbors, can you demonstrate that by example and show your children that you will not inflict hate upon others by not giving them the same fundamental rights that you have?

You don’t have to be gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender or even know someone that is to care about this lack of basic rights. Many organizations that fight for LGBT human rights are setup so that everyone can get involved.

Lastly, if you don’t think the cause doesn’t pertain to you because you don’t know someone affected, you’ve finished this post – I’m affected.

Links

HRC (Human Rights Campaign)
Public Agenda: Gay Rights
Divided We Fail
Speak Out
Gay Rights Watch
Gay Politics

Comments On This Post

There is enough hate in this world that hate and/or negative comments will not be tolerated on this post. With enough hate in the world for my life and my love, I’m keeping my blogging space clear of that. If you don’t like who I am, your recourse is to simply not read what I have to say…

This post was written by I’m Blogging That’s former owner, Katy Castro who can now be found blogging at Unedited Life.